I just realised that I still have a crush on my first love. While looking at some old pics I came across an old pic of mine and I thought, yes I have never gotten over him, although he was not in love with me, I was with him and I didn't know that at time it would pain me so much that deep down when I see pics in the present, I still hurt in a different way, sort of happy pain....

thats me at my present location....

Friends visiting

Yesterday was a nice day and I did what I felt like. I had to do a few cakes of which I did and although I have not taken any pics, I will let you know that 2 were plain vanilla iced cakes for birthdays, one was a chocolate fudge cake with fudge frosting on top..... and the last one was a cream filled cake with strawberries, like a black forest gateau. Love my work at times.

While doing those cakes, my teacher who had taught me in the primary years came with her son and actually they have been family friends with our family and me and my brother have grown up together with their kids and now my brother being the best friend to her eldest son and I being a good friend to her daughter, it feels like as if I finished school yesterday.

At first they thought that they would surprise me but it's a small town and somehow the word did get around that they were visiting and so I was not surprised or shocked, although it would have been great if I could have invited the whole clan of 19 people home for dinner but then my mum and sis had already made plans and i had to stay and keep the cafe open, but I did visit them later in the day. They were visiting here with her son's, in-laws and the whole clan were at the Campsite. I went there back in the evening to visit them and although they did insist that I stay over and have 'boko boko' with them, I had to decline that offer as I had to get back to town early and had to run the cafe.

Our family and My teachers family go a long way back and we have come come along despite having our quarrels and ups and downs and finally just patching it up and getting on with life, and it would be all wrong if we threw away some 40-45 years of friendship and after all it does no one good.
Their son is a my brother's best friend, I am close to their daughter and my mum and teacher have been close friends. They were here at short notice when my dad passed away so that makes them family.

Me, myself and I.

I am back....I know it was hard to leave everything and delete but I guess, I was going through a transition and had a lot of problems in the sense that one and all of my friends never supported me in what i was going through... hard as it may seem, I needed their help but they never wrote, and instead those from whom I did not expect, did write.
So all in all I am starting afresh and getting on with life. I know that I will never get acceptance from my mom or some of my relatives, on some issues but then I have to live my life and I do what's best, that is enjoy it and do what I want to do.

Yesterday, my sis Jenny had a big talk with my mom regarding sexuality issues and whether being gay or lesbian is accepted, but from what it seemed, our mom refused to speak on any terms about these issues and I was sort of hurt that why wouldn't she just accept the fact that it's ok, and I her son am gay? Hard huh?

Apart from all this, issues at the so called school with the teachers leaving, have not been resolved, and I hope that they do that asap. I hate anyone to get hurt, and I think I have talked about this before that I don't want to be judgmental like Cruella de Ville, by blaming others for what they have not done, and take things to a different level.
I gather that we all have to forgive but to what extent???? One of my fellow bloggers says this in 'SINS'.